First Girl
Someone tell the first girl I ever loved
She's still in my head
Tell her I'm sorry I want her in my bed
Tell her I regret the things I said
Tell her I'm hurt our friendship is dead
Tell her I knew the risk and foolishly went ahead
Tell her I wish I said nothing instead
Tell her it kills me when she's left me on read
Tell her I felt for her way before I was a newlywed
Tell her my uncertainty filled me with dread
Tell her even though my heart bled
I'm not sorry
I felt what I felt
I said what I said
Heart on my sleeve
Caused her to leave
But gave me relief
The shame released.
Image Description
Portrait torso crop of an autistic Black woman smiling softly while using her pink popsocket stim toy. She has long hair tied back by a lavendar headscarf, multicolor pastel cutout earrings, a nose ring, and a white crop tank on.
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