Missing Out
Life isn't sacred. And something they won't miss. Ignorance is bliss. And non existence is. A loving kiss.
Content Warning: mother wounds, unhappiness, suicidal ideation and dissatisfaction
Image Description
An empty darkened school room, chairs, desk and a clean whiteboard. A blue sky is reflected in the white board.
Its funny how my mother's patience
Undermined her happiness
How my impatience undermines mine
Happiness is a myth
A story since the beginning of time
A burden I won't share
With the children that could have been mine
Suffering they won't bare
A gift for my unborn kids
Life isn't sacred
And something they won't miss
Ignorance is bliss
And non existence is
A loving kiss.
I have many poems full of existential dread as there was a time in my life where I despised my own existence. I have questioned life, love and happiness. I had so many religious messages growing up about the sanctity of life and it wasn't ringing true for me. The space to wallow in my misery and dissatisfaction and express my deep unhappiness has been so important to me and my relationship with myself.
Being discriminated against, learning about the historical brutalization and torture of people like me, the continuous exploitation of vulnerable people really continues to wreck my mental well-being, it has since I was a child. Despair swallowed me up for a long time and I'm grateful for hope.
